For the Longest Time
by SmurfyFriend
Summary: I didn't ask for this. I didn't ask to be a survivor. I didn't ask to be part of a zombie apocalypse. I didn't ask to watch my family die, to watch the entire world crumble. I didn't ask to, but that's what happened anyways. ZombieApocalypse!AU, thinly veiled Spamono, RoChu, AusHun, GerIta. Rated T for gore and Romano's mouth
1. Act I

**HEYOO!**

 **Just dropping some STORY on y'all! I've kinda had this in the works for awhile, and finally got it all typed up and stuff!**

 **Hope it's as good as I'd hoped it'd be; I'll be honest, This was hard to write. I've really gotten out of practice with writing. plus it was surprisingly hard to write a zombie apocalypse story that didn't draw too much on The Walking Dead or Last of Us. (I mean, granted there's still some similarities. but it's not too bad at least lol**

 **Anyways, enjoy! I left pairings and triggerwarnings in the description xD Bring tissues, it's a rough one. and a long one too!**

* * *

Act I

There were three days that changed my life. At least significantly enough to be worth mentioning.

Fratello and I were eight and seven when it all began. That was the first day that changed my life.

I wish I could, but I'll never forget that night.

Nonno had tucked us in a few hours before. He'd even scolded Lovino for forgetting to brush his teeth. We were so excited… Big Brother Antonio was sleeping over because his Mami and Papi had to work late that night. Fratello acted like he was grumpy (he was always grumpy, even before that day) but he was excited that Antonio was sleeping over too. He was even gonna sleep in our room with us! After Nonno tucked us in and left, we didn't go right to sleep (Who has ever gone right to sleep at a sleepover, even on a school night?). We stayed up and talked for at least an hour, talking about whatever came to our idle seven, eight, and twelve year old minds.

I wish I'd known then what I know now. That that was going to be our last real moments of innocence.

Toni was about to finish a joke when we heard the explosions.

Once the initial shock of the loud sound wore off, Fratello was the first to speak. "What the fuck was that?!" He hissed.

"Ve, Fratello," I said, "Don't'a say the F-word… You don't'a have any more quarters for the Swear Jar."

"Shut up, Feli." He replied quickly, climbing out of bed and running to the window. "H…Holy Crapola…"

Tonio and I climbed out of the bed and sleeping bag and ran to the window. "Holy crapola…" Toni confirmed.

We had a great view of the city from our house. Lovino and I used to watch the lights when we couldn't fall asleep. But when we looked out the window, the entire city looked like it was on fire. "What happened out there?" Toni's voice was barely a murmur.

Before either of us could offer a solution, the bedroom door opened. I looked back and saw Nonno standing in the doorway. Even in the low light, he looked like he was really pale. His knuckles on the doorknob looked white. He looked like he was gripping it so tightly it would snap off in his hand. "V-ve! We're'a sorry we're still up, Nonno!" I said, assuming we were in trouble for still being awake, "The explosion woke us up!"

"That's alright, Feliciano." His voice had a quiver to it he tried to hide. "But right'a now I need you to do'a something very, very important."

"What is it Nonno?" Even Lovino's usually loud voice was quiet.

Nonno walked to the window and kneeled down to our level. "We're'a going on a road trip," he explained, his voice still shaky. "So I need you to'a take everything out of your school backpacks, and'a put two days of clothes and one quiet toy in there. Then get dressed and come downstairs."

Lovino groaned. "Just ONE toy?" he whined, "That sucks!"

Nonno tried to smile. "I know, Lovi." He said. "you can bring two if they're small."

Then I piped up. "What about Tonio, Nonno?" I asked, "He just has his clothes from yesterday and tomorrow. And he'a doesn't have any of his toys here!"

"That's ok, Feli." Antonio smiled, more sincerely than Nonno. "I don't play with toys anymore. And I think my Mami has a change of clothes she keeps for me here."

"Good," Nonno replied, standing back up and turning on the lights so we could see. "Antonio, when you're all ready to go, come downstairs and help me load the car. Lovino?"

"Si, Nonno?" Lovi replied expectantly.

"When you're all done, help your little brother." Nonno told him, running out of the room. "Hurry! _Andiamo,_ boys! We don't'a have a lot of time!" I could barely hear him as he ran down the stairs. "We have to be out of the house in no more than fifteen minutes!"

My young mind found it hard to understand. What was so urgent, so scary that even Nonno looked scared?

Antonio finished packing first and went downstairs like Nonno told him to. Lovino grumbled, roughly shoving clothes into his black backpack. "Stupid one toy rule." He grumbled, grabbing his pencil box filled with racecars, "How the fuck does he expect me to only choose one toy?! I can't'a choose just one!"

"Quarter, Lovino." I told him, pointing at the jar sitting on the nightstand labeled 'Pottymouth Pays'. "Ve, maybe if you ask real nice Nonno will let you take the box cause it's'a like one big toy?"

"Maybe," Lovino grumbled, taking a few coins from his tomato-shaped piggy bank and dropping them into the jar.

I looked into the jar. "Hey, you cheated, Lovino!" I cried. "That's not a quarter! That's'a two dimes and a nickel!"

"That's twenty-five cents, Feli. That's how much a quarter's worth." Lovino groaned. "God, Feli, you're so stupid."

"I'm not stupid!" I told myself more than him. "I just haven't learned that yet in math."

"Sometimes I swear you got dropped on your big fat head." Lovino grumbled under his breath, zipping up his backpack. "Hurry up and get packed."

I turned away and kept packing my bag. I stuffed my two favorite shirts and jeans, and also clean socks and underwear. I didn't really pack a toy, necessarily. I decided I was going to bring my new sketchbook since it didn't have a whole lot of pictures in it, and I loved drawing pictures! I forced that and my pencil box in my red dinosaur backpack and zipped it up. We both finished getting dressed, and slung our backpacks over our shoulders. "All ready?" Lovino asked.

I nodded. "Got extra underwear for when you piss the bed?" he asked.

I flushed in embarrassment. "You do it more than I do!"

" _Chigi!"_ His vocal tic started showing again. "I TOLD you, it was a stupid fuc—" he caught himself. "Freaking… Stupid FREAKING squirrel."

He grumbled and sulked away. I looked under the bed. "Pasta!" I called, "Here kitty, kitty, kitty!"

A small mew met my ears, and a little white kitty cat with an orange splotch on her head appeared. I scooped her up in my arms. "Ve, C'mon, Pasta," I told her, "We have to go now."

My backpack on my back and my kitty in my arms I looked back at our room one last time, and closed the door. I helped Lovino find his hissy, grumpy cat Nero, and then we went downstairs. All of the cabinets in the kitchen were open, and looked like everything had been taken from them. Right after we came into the kitchen, Antonio and Nonno came in from the entryway. Nonno handed me an apple and Lovino a tomato. "Have a snack in the car, we have to leave." He told us. "Boys, say goodbye to Pasta and Nero, and let's'a go."

"They're not coming with us?" I gripped Pasta tighter.

"Not today, Feliciano." Nonno looked like he was about to cry, his eyes were full of remorse. "Pasta and Nero can't come on the trip with us. But they have lots of food and water here."

I looked down at the kitty in my arms. "B-but…" I blubbered. "Pasta's my best friend, Nonno…ve…"

Nonno knelt down in front of me. "I know, Feli…" he spoke softly. "But the kitties can't come with us… There isn't room for them in the car."

"Ok…" I wiped at my eyes and put Pasta down on the couch. "Bye-bye, Pasta… Be good, okay?"

The kitty licked my nose and headbutted me lightly. "Come on, Feli." Lovino muttered, his own eyes looking watery and his arms vacant of Nero. "We gotta go now…"

I sniffed a little and took his hand. For once, he didn't even pull away. He just held my hand as we walked out to Nonno's car. It was stuffed full of food and blankets, and also the First Aid Kit from the cupboard in the hall. Toni helped me up in the car and buckled me in without my Booster seat (I was almost tall enough without it anyways). Once Tonio was in the car, Nonno started the car, then moved the stick thing with all the numbers and letters and started to drive away.

Nonno told us we had to go through the city to get to where we were going. Or maybe not so much told us as was thinking out loud _loudly_ about how we had to go through the city. Whichever it was, he looked back at us with the mirror on the windshield. He warned us that the city was going to be scary, and that we had to keep the doors locked and the windows up no matter what. We knew it was bad. But we really had no idea it would be as bad as it was.

We had to pass dozens of people pleading desperately for help. Even families with children. "There's'a nothing we could'a do for them." Nonno told us, sounding more like he was trying to convince himself again. "We don't have'a room in the car, a-and we have to save the food we have…"

We were almost out of the city when it happened.

A loud thump noise hit my ear. I looked over at where it'd come from. There was a man across the hood of the car. Except… He didn't look right… He looked like his face had been eaten away. His skin was a dull grey, and there was a stream of dark red around his mouth, like he'd taken a bite of spaghetti and meatballs and didn't wipe his face after. His eyes were milky white, and it looked like he couldn't see very well. Even over the noise of the car, it sounded like the man was growling loudly, like a big scary animal. Right as I was about to ask what was wrong with the man on the car, Nonno muttered something to Antonio. Antonio nodded, and handed Nonno something that was in the glove box. The man put his face closer to the windshield. Nonno had a large kitchen knife in his hand. I heard the hum of the window, then let out a scream as Nonno jabbed the knife into the man's head right next to his milky eyes. The man drooped down, and fell off the hood of the car as Nonno removed the sharp knife. "N-Nonno!" My voice was barely more than a squeak. "V-ve-! Y-You-! You _killed_ someone!"

Suddenly Nonno looked forty years older than he ever had. I could almost see every wrinkle and worry line in his aged face. He shook his head, using one hand to wipe at his eyes and the other to keep steering. "No, Feliciano." His voice quivered, "That man… H-he… _He wasn't alive before I did that._ "

The whole world seemed to turn on its head in that moment. Lots of times that night, but especially then. I sat in the soft cloth seat, listening as Nonno explained that when people were dying, they weren't staying dead. That some fungus from some distant country had reproduced with a lab-made virus with a long name to create a sickness that made a person inhuman. He explained that "Patient Zero"-the first patient of the sickness- was being kept at the Army base on the outskirts of town for research, and escaped. He explained there was no cure yet, and that it was spreading like gasoline fueled wildfire. He explained that when someone died, and the brain wasn't destroyed, they came back as one of those— _things_. He also explained that when someone was bitten by one of those _things_ , they became one of them. He told us we had to leave our city-our _home_ \- because it'd become overrun with Infected.

That first night, almost nobody fell asleep. Not that any of us wanted to, with the sound of Infected scratching at the doors of the barricaded doors of the abandoned mechanic's garage, all huddled around a radio. The crackly static gave us only small news blurbs about the infection spreading, and advising citizens to barricade themselves somewhere safe. Even though there was little to no sleep to be had by anyone, Nonno still hugged us three, stroking our hair, speaking to us in quiet Italian. "Mami and Papi…" Antonio's voice was quiet. "Th-they… They probably died in the city…. Didn't they…?"

Nonno shook his head. "We don't'a know that, Antonio," his voice was quiet. "They could'a be just fine…. We'll leave them a message here, alright?" He patted him on the back. "Go on now, why don't you boys go try and find a few markers, and anything you think we might be able to use."

Lovino and Antonio both nodded and stood from where we sat. I started to, but Nonno pulled me back. "It's alright, Feli." He said softly, "Let them do it… you should sleep while we're in a safe place."

"How could anyone sleep on a night like this?" I asked, resting my head over his heart.

"I know, little one," he murmured softly, "I know…"

Then Nonno did something I'll never forget. Nonno sang slowly and softly.

" _Oh, oh, oh, oh,_

 _For the longest time,_

 _If you said goodbye to me tonight,_

 _There would still be music left to write,_

 _What else could I do?_

 _I'm so inspired by you,_

 _That hasn't happened for the longest time."_

The act itself wasn't surprising to me. Nonno loved to sing. He sang around the house regularly (and even claimed that in his hayday he was a classically trained opera singer). But here, now, it truly baffled me. "Nonno, why are you singing?" I asked, "You sing when you're happy… but you're not."

"I'm'a not singing because I'm'a happy, little Feliciano." I had never heard my Nonno's voice so serious before. "No… I'm'a singing because… It's'a something…. It's'a something that…. Makes us _different._ "

"What makes us different?" Nonno was talking in riddles again, "I don't understand…"

He smiled that sad smile again and held me to his chest. "You will someday, Feliciano." His voice was soft. "You will, someday."

I didn't say anything after that. I just listened to Nonno's voice, his singing soft and slow.

" _Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh,_

 _For the longest time."_

That night, beyond all odds and reasons, I fell asleep.


	2. Act II

***le gasp* an update!? on the same day, at that!? WHAT IS THIS MADNESS?!**

 **Lol jk. I actually have this whole story (?) typed up and ready to post. probably all of these will be posted tonight xD I'm mean, aren't I?** **Oh, and in case y'all are wondering why the song, I just like Billy Joel's "For the Longest Time" and think it could be really sad if it's sung slow and quietlike :3**

* * *

Act II

Almost four years had passed since Day Zero, our small group moving from temporary home to temporary home without significant improvement to our situation. We spent a little over three months living in the Garage before we had finally depleted the supplies available to us. We roamed around on backroads, very rarely meeting other survivors. We had more friends join us. Vash, Lilly… Bella, Lars… Jett… He was a lot of fun. He sure talked funny! And Bella was so sweet… she could make any of us smile. Vash and Lars, they were both kind of scary, but they made sure the group had supplies… Lilly was really quiet, but she was really nice too. I really liked our group… They traveled around with us for awhile, but Jett left because he wanted to investigate a city in Kansas to see if his cousins-who apparently were more like brothers to him- had survived, and if they were still there. I hoped he'd find them… He deserved good news.

Our most permanent home had been a small church in the middle of the woods, and we were there for two years until the defenses finally reached a point of giving up. We lost the few survivors that had joined our group in that…. By the time we had finally escaped, it was down to just the four of us again. Vash… Lilly… Bella… Lars… All of them. Lost… in almost one fell swoop. Needless to say, that was a rough and sleepless night for the rest of us. Add to this that the car that had lasted us this long was finally on its last leg and used as an Infected Bomb, and it was not an easy time traveling until we found the Subaru covered in Infected guts and filled with untouched supplies from the previous owner (who we were sure wasn't going to miss the supplies since he was still strapped into the front seat). Nonno called it "the car that just won't fucking die." (he gave me and Lovino both a quarter for that)

Almost five years to the day since the world had begun its apocalypse, mine ended again.

We had found another safe place. A married couple that Nonno did business with before Day Zero found us while Lovino and Antonio were out on a supply run. Nonno and I stayed back to watch camp. Elizabeta and Roderich had out on a firewood run when they found our crude camp. Once Lovino and Antonio came back, they immediately offered their home to us since Nonno and them had done business for so long and could be described as good friends.

The Eddelsteins were in an optimal position for the apocalypse. They had an electric fence kept operational by generators and a waterwheel nearby they had managed to siphon power from, and that kept Infected-and uninfected uninvited guests- out. They also had a massive greenhouse with a wide variety of vegetables. Not to mention apple trees on the outskirts of the property. They also had gas stove from natural gas, so they were actually able to _cook_. The only downsides to the Eddelstein property was that there was no way to replenish the ammo they lost shooing off Infected other than a supply run in town. And the other issue was that the house was not very well insulated. In fact, it was freezing cold come winter. But, on the plus side, there was a large potbelly stove that heated most of the house.

I was helping Elizabeta prepare dinner. Roderich was in the parlor, enjoying his prized grand piano after hours of mending the fence and watering and tending to the crops. Lovino was on watch up on the roof. Nonno and Antonio were out on a supply run in town.

I hummed to myself, cutting a fresh tomato picked from the garden. Lovino and Toni were going to love dinner. Tomatoes were their absolute favorite foods! And they'd been so rare to us in the time since Day Zero, so they had really come to appreciate the garden and the precious red spheres of flavor it offered.

A loud screech, followed by a pause, then another loud screech hit my ears. Someone just came through the gate. There was a muffled yelling sound. Elizabeta and I shared a glance of worry, and started out towards the entryway. My stomach was in a tight knot. Something terrible had happened. Even I could tell that much. My grip was tight on the stainless steel cutting knife I'd brought with me.

Once we got out to the front gate, Roderich and Lovino had already beaten us to the punch figuring out what had happened. Nonno and Antonio stood just inside the yard, Nonno's arm slung over Antonio's shoulder and both of them covered head to toe in Infected blood. Antonio helped him sit, leaning him back against a shady apple tree while I made a move to get closer, to find out what the commotion was about. Just as I did, Lovino turned away, his head in his hands. "Ch-chigi! _Shit_ ," he cussed quietly, not caring that we heard or that his own vocal tic showed. "Shit, shit, shit, **_SHIT._** "

Right as I opened my mouth to speak, all the words I wanted to say tumbled from my mouth in silence. I couldn't do anything but stand and stare when I finally realized what had made Lovino look away. The kitchen knife dropped from my hands and landed on the ground with a quiet thud.

Nonno's shirt was torn at the shoulder, showing the once tan Italian olive skin, and a bloody patch that looked as though it'd been ripped off.

Nonno was bit.

Nonno was bit where we couldn't save him.

Had he been bitten on the arm, or the leg, we could've saved him… It would've been dangerous, and it wouldn'tve been easy, but we could've saved him.

We couldn't save Nonno when the bite was there.

"N-No…" I finally found my voice and stumbled to him, falling to my knees in front of him once I reached him. "N-Nonno, no… V-ve, N-not'a you… N-not'a you…"

"I'm sorry," Antonio sounded as if he was choking on his words. "R-Rotters caught us in a convenience store… W-we tried to fight them off, but there were j-just too many of them…"

I was so dumbstruck I barely registered Lovino shouting wildly in fast Italian, his voice a panicked shriek as he lashed out to punch Antonio wherever his fists would land. My eyes were so blurred with tears, I could barely make out Antonio half-heartedly defending himself and pulling Lovino up against his chest in a tight embrace. I was so detached from the world I could hardly hear Lovino's cries of grief break into sobs and wails, muffled barely by Antonio's sweatshirt. No, all I could do was sit and stare at the torn flesh on Nonno's shoulder. He was already starting to look pale. Already, it was nearly time. Too soon… Far too soon…

I was brought back to earth by the sight of Antonio whispering quiet words to Lovino, then planting a kiss to his forehead. Lovino half-stumbled to the ground where I sat with Nonno, his back against the apple tree. I tried to ignore the quiet discussion over "who should be the one to do it", and instead tried to focus on Nonno's bloodshot chocolatey brown eyes instead.

A weak smile forced its way over his expression. "Lovino, Feliciano," his voice was barely a croak. "Come and'a give'a your Nonno a hug…"

Immediately Lovino and I complied. I buried my face in his dusty white button up shirt, breathing in his scent. It was almost overpowered by the smell of blood and sweat, but it was still there. Old leather and lamp oil. It was one of my favorite scents. Tears burned the inside of my eyelids like they were a caustic acid. When I tried to speak, my voice was a whimper. "I love you, Nonno…"

"I love you too, Feliciano." His voice was hoarse, like his throat was sandpaper. "You'll'a be a good boy for me… Won't you…?"

"Of course he will be." Lovino answered before I could respond. "And if he doesn't, I'll kick his ass."

"Lovi," Nonno chided lightly, keeping up his sad smile. "Be nice… to your… your'a brother…"

Lovino seemed to choke on his tears again. "S-si, Nonno." He responded hastily.

Nonno moved us so we could look him in the eyes. "Lovino… Feliciano…" All his strength went into keeping his voice steady. "P-Promise me… Promise me you'll'a take care of eachother…" His breath shuddered. "Once I've left… You're'a the only family you'll'a have left." His eyes closed. "If I've'a taught you nothing else in my life, I hope and pray I've taught you how important family is.

Lovino and I nodded furiously. "S-si, Nonno," His voice was strangled, "We promise, right Fratello?"

"Right," I agreed, nodding and shaking more tears from my eyes.

"That goes… that goes for Antonio, and Roderich and Elizabeta as well." Nonno coughed. "The… the blood of the covenant… is thicker than the waters of the womb…"

"What does that _mean_ , Nonno?" I squeaked.

"It means," Lovino spoke before Nonno even tried to. "That the friendships we hold dear to us are just as important as family."

"Very good, Lovino." Nonno said, his small smile becoming a little bit brighter for a moment.

Lovino simply blinked tears away. Nonno's breath was starting to sound more forced. He was starting to sound more like one of _them._ He didn't have long…

I swallowed my tears as best as I could. "I… I think I understand now, Nonno…" I told him, "Why you sing, I mean."

I didn't know if he could hear me. He wasn't responding. "W-when you'a first explained it… I didn't… a-and you'a told me I'd'a understand when I was older… I do now…. I just'a wanted to let you know that…"

I kept hugging him, listening to his strangled breaths that seemed to be getting slower by the minute. "Y-you'a sing because…. Because you did before Day Zero… a-and because… because it makes you different from them…"

I wiped my eyes. "A-and'a not just the Infected 'them'." My voice was cracking. "Th-the Bandits… the bad people we've encountered… They don't'a sing… You DO.

"We've had to do and see so many terrible things, from Day Zero til now…" I cringed, thinking of the lives lost thus far. "B-but you… Every night, you reminded me we could get through, that we still have hearts." I sucked in a breath. "Thank you, Nonno. For everything." I pressed a kiss to his clammy forehead.

I looked up. Antonio was looking down at us apologetically. I knew it was time. I didn't want it to be. I wanted more time. Lovino and I held onto Nonno's clammy hands as Antonio knelt beside us. "I can't thank you enough for all that you've done for me, Rommulus." He murmured, "But the least I can do for you is this."

Nonno simply gave a choked wheeze in reply. I kept my eyes squeezed shut. I couldn't watch. Not Nonno. I felt his hands leave mine as Roderich and Elizabeta carried Nonno away. I heard Lovino cry again, and pull me against his chest. "Tonio…. Tonio's going to do it…?" I heard myself squeak, keeping my eyes closed.

"S-si, fratello," Lovino's voice quivered. "Tonio… Tonio's'a going to'a make sure that when Nonno dies… h-he doesn't come back."

I sucked in a breath, exhaling quiet sobs and keeping my eyes squeezed shut. I wished we could go home. I wished we'd all just wake up and this be a horrible dream. I wished we could be going to school even!

" _I don't care what consequence it brings,_

 _I have been a fool for lesser things,_

 _I want you so bad-"_

My voice broke, and both of us jumped at the sudden sound of gunfire. That prompted Lovino's cries to become full blown wails. I tried to comfort him, but my voice was weak.

" _I intend to hold you for the longest time"_

That was the second day that my entire world changed.


	3. Act III

**OK. Getting down to kinda the nitty-gritty here. Would you believe I almost ended this at the last chapter? But I wanted to include the German brothers and more angst because I'm not a nice person :3 tee hee!**

* * *

Act III

The third day was the day he came into my life.

A little over four years had passed since Nonno died. I was sixteen. Lovino, he was seventeen. Antonio had deemed himself the adult of the group after Nonno passed away, and rightfully so being 21 now. We had managed to stay at the Eddelstein house the entire time, without major incidents, but we weren't really sure for how much longer. A few months previous, the governments of other countries finally came to our aid after seeing that waiting out the infection wasn't going to work, and thus beefed up its forces and manpower to drop bombs in heavily infected cities and set up permanent refugee camps. But the problem with the camps, as we'd found out through contact with other survivors, was that they were military run. Meaning it was almost better to be out on the road with Infected chasing after you. There were a lot of cities hit, from what we were told… Atlanta, Dallas, Kansas City, New York and Richmond were definitely hit… I was reasonably sure that Portland and Seattle were hit, much to the sadness of Lovino, Antonio and myself. Columbus was definitely hit. We could feel the effects even as far out as we were. Which was why no one was sure how much longer we would be there. The blast came from upwind and upriver of us, so it seemed like we were catching all the bad stuff from it. It was getting harder and harder to find animals to hunt, and the Greenhouse started bearing less and less. Even the apple trees seemed like they were dropping less fruit.

About a year before the day in question, Roderich and Elizabeta made the decision that their home could be a resting point for weary survivors. Travelers could trade food, or weapons, or ammunition, or other such commodities for a night or two's rest. Or a hot meal and medical help if they needed it.

Lovino was completely against it to begin with. He was convinced we were going to get killed for being "too goddamn nice in a fucking zombie apocalypse". For once, I almost agreed with him. I hated myself for agreeing with him, but he had a point. Those days, the survivors were almost as bad as the Infected. If we were too trusting, it could've been the end of our surviving the end of the world. Elizabeta assured us it would be to our benefit. She also pointed out it would be an ample way to survive, trading food and ammunition for temporary lodging.

Much to everyone's surprise, it was actually working really well. Every now and then there would be a group that tried to overstay their welcome or drive us out with force. But they were always taken care of easily. Either by gunfire and combat, or Elizabeta's special Foxglove Tea and a knife to the head. Of course, that was only the bad people. The people that tried to take the house.

There were people that were allowed to stay longer… Groups that were especially beaten up or travel worn could spend an extra day or two, provided they had sufficient payment. We even had a few people that stayed permanently- but only because they had "marketable skills". Yao Wang and his love Ivan Bragvinski were two. Yao was a doctor in Atlanta before Day Zero, and Ivan was a Medical Assistant at the same hospital. I don't think Roderich kept him because of his MA training though. Ivan was a TANK. I once watched him rip the head off of an Infected with his bare hands, then use it to kill another one. All with that big childish smile on his face! It was terrifying! What was even more scary was that he was older than Antonio- he had to be at least 25, if not more- but he was like a big scared child. He was really sensitive, and sometimes had nightmares that'd wake up the whole house. It really pissed off Lovino, who had taken to sleeping with Antonio in his bed("because it's fucking cold! It's not like I like the idiot or anything, jeez!") but it just scared me. I slept next to him and Yao, and I could hear him crying through the walls about his sisters. I guess they'd been bitten and he had to be the one to end it. I sympathized with him. I missed Nonno terribly. I couldn't imagine what would happen if I lost Lovino too.

I'm getting really off track.

The day I'm talking about, was when I was on watch: Four years and seven months from the day Nonno died. Almost ten years from when all of this started.

The Eddelsteins had modified the roof of their home to accompany a guard tower. We all rotated who was on watch every three hours. I was almost to the end of my shift. Soon Antonio would come to replace me for their shifts, and I could draw for a little while. My sketchbook was finally down to the very very last scraps of pages, though. Since Nonno died, I'd taken to drawing whenever I got the chance. It was nice, getting to draw things I missed- Like Nonno, and Pasta, and Nero. And friends from school… I missed my old friends a lot. But I also drew things like Roderich playing his Piano, or Elizabeta cooking. Or Lovino and Antonio hugging when he didn't think I was looking. I'll never understand why he was so concerned to hide whatever it was he and Toni were to eachother, honestly. I've known Lovi loved him since we were kids.

I was in the midst of planning my next drawing when I saw them hobble out of the woods. There were only two, one with silver colored hair and a t-shirt with jeans and the other with a gray baseball cap covering blonde hair, a black tank top and green camo pants. The latter had his arm draped over the silverette's shoulder, obviously wounded or tired. The one with silver hair started waving his arm frantically. "Hey!" he shouted, checking over his shoulder to make sure they weren't followed by Infected, "Is anyone in there?! The signs on the road said there was a safe resting point here!"

They weren't the first survivors I'd encountered on one of my shifts. I followed procedure. I pressed a little red button that alerted Roderich and everyone else in the house there was new arrivals, then raised the sniper rifle in my hands and took aim, right between the bright red eyes. Just in case they were some of the bad ones. "Put your weapons on the ground." I called down to them.

The silver haired one hesitated for a moment, but eventually nodded and put his weapons- a machete almost as long as his arm, a handgun with two clips, and a large knife- down on the ground before assisting the other with his weapons- a handgun with two clips, a large caliber hunting rifle, and a knife. "What're your names?" I asked, not taking the crosshairs off of them as I walked down the stairs of the tower.

"I'm Gilbert. Gilbert Bielschmidt." The silver-haired one replied, then looked over at the other with his arm over his shoulder. "And my younger brother, Ludwig."

The blonde looked hurt. No visible bites but it looked like he'd taken a bad knock to the head. I walked to the gate, careful not to trip over the uneven ground. "Your brother, he looks hurt. What happened?"

Gilbert looked at the other with worry in his face. "We just got out of a bad camp." He explained, "Military dogs destroyed it because the leader didn't want to be under their rule, and were seen as traitors. We barely got out alive."

"Is he bit?"

"No." Gilbert responded almost automatically. "He just took a gun's butt to the head and a sprained ankle. But we didn't get to give it sufficient medical care, so I think it's infected."

I was cautious to let them in. Their story seemed pretty hard to believe. Though to their credit, it was completely probable. There was probably a fair amount of paranoia in the Military camps. I opened the first set of gates. "Go inside between the two sets of gates." I ordered, "Leave your weapons. We'll get them for you once we've determined you're not a threat."

He did as I said, almost carrying Ludwig over the threshold of the gates. I closed the gates behind them. "This isn't permanent," I assured him. "It's'a just a place you can wait until my'a leader gets here that's'a safe and away from Infected."

Gilbert nodded and leaned his brother against the wall, helping him sit. "I understand." He said, "In this day and age you can't trust anyone too much."

We didn't have to wait more than a few moments before Roderich, Elizabeta, Yao, and Lovino were at the gate. Roderich groaned once he got close enough to see. " _You_ …" he groaned.

"Roddy!" Gilbert put on a huge smirk and waved a lot. "Well, shit, I knew this place looked familiar!"

"You know him?" I asked, confused.

Roderich rubbed his eyes in annoyance. "They're my cousins." He explained. "We used to visit eachother regularly before Day Zero."

Gilbert kept up his shit-eating grin. "And here I thought you'd been killed, turned, or driven out!" Gilbert cackled, "I should'a known you'd still be kickin'! Hell, you've even got some cutie kids guardin' the place for ya!"

"I'm'a not a kid, and neither is my brother, you'a stupid fucking German Potato sucker!" Fratello spat, looking almost fluffed up like Nero back home, "And you'd'a better fucking watch who you call cute. We're still on the safe side of the gate!"

"Sorry, sorry, you're right." Gilbert shook his head, "Ignoring the fact I think I have ass hairs older than you, Roderich, you think you could let us in?" Gilbert looked down at his younger brother, smoothing blonde hair away from his eyes. "Luddy's hurt bad…"

Roderich looked conflicted. Sure they were family, but in this day and age… "How many infected have you killed?" he asked at long last.

Gilbert thought for a moment. "I've lost count…. Probably a lot." Gilbert looked back down at his brother, who had resigned himself to fitful sleep. "for both of us."

"And Living? How many Uninfected have you killed?" Roderich's question hit like an arrow. Gilbert visibly cringed.

"Ten," he replied, without batting an eye, but still looking down. "And two."

"Who were they?"

That question usually determined if someone could stay. It seemed like the bad ones never remembered who they killed or why. The good ones could remember who they were, why they did it… even what they looked like or what they were wearing. "Three were bandits," he started, "Two were teammates that were about to turn- Tino and Berwald… Five were the military dogs that did this." Gilbert cringed in visible pain.

"And Ludwig's two?" Roderich asked quietly.

Gilbert frowned at the disoriented blonde. "Kid's had it rough," he mumbled. "One, his childhood best friend, who was about to turn- Kiku Honda…" He looked as though he was about to cry. "The other… O-Our Vatti… vhen he vas bit…"

My heart went out to the blonde German…. He looked my age, but so much more battle-worn… scars crisscrossed his arms and back, the largest passing over his shoulder and down his back. His breathing was labored, and his forehead was shiny from sweat. He looked feverish and dirty; neither one of them looked as though they'd had any kind of cleaning in months.

After several moments of consideration, Roderich nodded in Antonio's direction. "Let them in. Then go and fetch their weapons."

Antonio nodded, then went to unlock the gate. "You may stay," Roderich grumbled, "Gilbert, you come with me and we can discuss our terms of your stay. We can bring Ludwig to our doctor and get him medical attention."

Yao looked down at the blonde German and shook his head. "Roderich, please send Ivan out when you go back inside," he said softly. "he look to heavy to carry on my own."

Roderich nodded, and Gilbert started to cross the threshold of the gates. Yao stopped him as he passed. "Y-you said…" he gulped. "Y-you said your younger brother… L-Ludwig… he kill a man named Kiku Honda… I-Is this true?"

Gilbert avoided Yao's watery brown eyes. "Yes." He said, his voice quiet. "he was bit on a supply run… Lud stayed with him til the very end… When it came time… I offered to be the one… But… Lud said it had to be him…" Gilbert swallowed the lump in his throat. "It was quick… Kiku thanked us for the time we spent together, and told us if we found his brother, to let him know he loved him."

Yao, who had been visibly pale throughout Gilbert's story, started trembling and fell to the ground, tears wracking his small frame. "I'm sorry." Gilbert's voice was almost silent, and his red eyes were closed. "Kiku was a good kid… he loved you very much, Wang Yao."

Gilbert carefully stepped around the man, keeping his eyes at the ground, following Roderich to the house. Nobody spoke as Yao sobbed, curled around himself. Lovino nudged me to get my gun so he could switch for watch, but that was all the interaction to be had. Poor Yao… we'd all lost so much….

Not five minutes after Gilbert left, Ivan emerged from the house and walked over to us at the gate. He saw Yao crying, and wordlessly sat down beside him, pulling the smaller man into a tight embrace. "Kiku," Yao whimpered, "My baby brother, Kiku…"

Ivan _shh_ -ed him, kissing his forehead a few times. "I know… I'm sorry, Yao-Yao…"

Several moments passed before anyone spoke again. "We have a job to do, Yao…"Ivan's voice was soft. "We can mourn for Kiku later… But for now, someone needs our help, and could die without us."

Yao seemed to hear Ivan's soft words, taking a few deep breaths to steady his mind and voice. "I- I know…" he forced the words out. "F-Feliciano, why don't you go and get the temporary infirmary ready? We'll meet you in a moment."

"S-si…" I murmured, happy to leave the sadness of the immediate area.

I'd had to watch terrible things since the world ended.

I had to watch my own Nonno kill an Infected, when I was just a child.

I had to watch Antonio put an axe through bandits' heads.

I had to watch teammates- _family_ \- die because of careless mistakes.

I couldn't do sadness anymore.

Nowadays sadness got you killed.

I obeyed Yao's order and got his bedroom prepared as a temporary infirmary. I had only just finished preparing hot water and Yao's medical kit when they brought the blonde into the room. "Wash his face, Feli," Yao's voice was even, clinical. "We need to keep his fever down… this wound is definitely infected. Sorry bastard must've gone without proper medical treatment for weeks."

I nodded, taking a washcloth and beginning to wash his face. Between fever and exhaustion, he had fallen into a restless sleep. His face, though the grime was thick, was almost stunning to look at. He had a prominent brow, and it looked as though it had done a lot of worrying in his time. He had a big nose too. Not as big as Ivan's, or Nonno's, but it was still big. "Feli, aiya, pick up the pace already." Yao chided, "We don't have all day."

"V-ve, S-sorry, Yao," I apologized quickly and dipped the cloth back into the water.

I tried not to be distracted by the blonde's face, as well as the fact he smelled of lamp oil and leather, and quickly cleaned up his face. Even as Yao treated the wounds, his pale face glistened with sweat as his body fought to stave off the fever. I was utterly useless; Yao had about finished suturing the wound on his head, and wrapped his injured ankle and there was nothing I could do but wipe the sweat from his head. "We've done all we can do." Yao said, his voice still even, still strictly clinical. "It's up to him, now."

Ivan nudged Yao gently. "F-Feli," Yao's clinical tone of voice cracked slightly, "Y-You're on Infirmary Infected Duty tonight. You understand what that means."

I nodded, a numbness in my chest. It meant if Ludwig stopped breathing, I put a knife into his temple. "S-si, Yao." I replied softly. "Take my bedroom for tonight."

"Thank you." Yao replied softly, "Ivan, aru, let's get some rest."

"Da, Yao-Yao." Ivan put a hand on the smaller man's shoulder. "It's been a long day."

They left the room in silence, leaving me to tend to Ludwig. I don't know what came over me. Maybe it was that he looked like he was my age. Maybe it just looked like he'd gone through as much as I did. Maybe I wanted to touch his hair because it looked like it had been years since anybody had. But for some reason or another, I found myself running my fingers through his greased hair. It seemed to soothe him, as his quiet groans of pain had quieted, and his pained face had relaxed somewhat. I found myself smile in what seemed like the first time in forever. Then I did something I hadn't done almost since Nonno died. I sang.

" _Oh, oh, oh  
For the longest time  
Oh, oh, oh  
For the longest time  
If you said goodbye to me tonight  
There would still be music left to write  
What else could I do  
I'm so inspired by you  
That hasn't happened for the longest time"_

I wasn't being very loud, so I wouldn't wake him, or anyone else for that matter. But I needed it. As I opened my mouth to half-sing more, I was interrupted. "You're singing." A soft voice murmured.

I looked down at the blonde, my cheeks flushing red when I saw icy blue eyes half open. "V-Ve!" I squeaked, "S-s-sorry, I-I-I woke you up, please'a don't'a be angry with'a me, I'll'a stop!"

To make matters worse, I realized my hand was still in his hair. I retracted it as if my hand was burned, "V-ve, I'm'a sorry," I apologized again, "I-I-I just'a couldn't help myself, and i-i-it seemed like it calmed you down, a-and I'm'a sorry, I'll'a just'a stop talking and'a let you sleep!" I hid my face behind my hands. Stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid!

"It's… alright…" the blonde still seemed as if he was groggy from sleep and fever. "it was nice… I… haven't had someone run their fingers in my hair since… since my Mutti… was alive…" he seemed to crack a smile.

"W-well still," I averted his eyes, "S-sorry to wake you up with'a my singing. I'll'a be quieter next time.

"It's alright." He assured me quietly, "That was nice too… I'd…. almost forgotten what singing was like….I haven't heard someone sing since before Day Zero."

I felt myself relax slightly. "Ve… My Nonno used to sing to us every night," I said softly, "He said it…. Made us different from them…" I felt myself drift into space thinking about Nonno again, but I brought myself back so I wasn't rude. "Ve, I'm'a sorry. My name's Feliciano."

"Ludwig." He nodded in acknowledgement. "Vhere exactly are ve…? My memory is a little hazy."

"You're at a safe place," I assured him, "A safe place, with family. Roderich said something about you being family."

"Roderich?" Ludwig seemed to perk up at the mention of the name. "So, he's survived ze end of ze vorld… Who vould be surprised?" he seemed to laugh dryly. "There's hope yet."

I smiled slightly at his improvement in mood. "Und my brother?" Ludwig looked up at me with hopeful eyes. "He is here too? He is safe?"

"Si," I assured him, "He's in the next room over, from what I can guess by the snores."

Ludwig seemed to put his head back in a relieved grin. "He's a stubborn dummkoph." He said, "But he was right. Ve made it."

I smiled again- Ludwig seemed to make that happen a lot. "Ve, go back to sleep, Ludwig." I said, bringing the blanket to his chin. "You still need to rest and let your wounds heal."

"Ja, alright," Ludwig murmured softly, letting his eyes drift shut. "Ehm… Feliciano…?"

"Si?"

Ludwig cleared his throat, looking embarrassed behind closed eyes. "Y-you can… sing more… und touch my hair more…. You know, if you'd like…"

My smile felt huge for the first time in forever. "I'd like to, then." I replied, running my fingers through his flaxen hair again.

He murmured something resembling a quiet 'thank you' and started to drift off. I half sang, half hummed softly.

"Once I thought my innocence was gone  
Now I know that happiness goes on  
That's where you found me  
When you put your arms around me  
I haven't been there for the longest time"

Ludwig coming to the Eddelstein household changed my life forever.

Actually, it changed all our lives forever.

Because it wasn't a week after they arrived when _they_ came.


	4. Act IV

**OK! This's the last chapter, unless people want me to continue. :D It's a rough one, be prepared.**

* * *

Act IV

It had started out as any other day. I was on Garden duty, tending to what would grow in the Greenhouse. Lovino was helping me, eating one of the tomatoes and grumbling that it "wasn't as fucking good as normal." Antonio was in the watch tower on guard duty. Ludwig and Gilbert were mending the fence, working to repay their debt to Roderich. I heard the tanks before I heard Antonio call out to us. We all ran out to the front as soon as we'd heard.

We saw them.

Before the gateway of our sanctuary, there were at least- at _least-_ a dozen men and women clothed in green fatigues, assault rifles and the muzzles of not one, but two tanks trained on us. "State your business here!" Roderich's loud voice broke the tense silence.

"We are the United States Department of Infection Control," A voice from what we now realized was the military spoke, "Roderich Eddelstein, you and your camp is in violation of USDIC Marshall Law, and unless you and everyone else here comes with us immediately, you will be eliminated."

"You can't be serious!" Roderich shook his head, "Providing a place to stay for travelers? Since when is that a crime!"

"Since when can that shit be _punished?_ " Lovino growled quietly to me.

I elbowed him. Even though it was true, there wasn't really any kind of government anymore per say, it didn't really seem smart to piss off the guys with the tanks pointed our way. "USDIC Mandate issued June of Year Five," the same voice rose again, "Clearly states that there shall be no more traveling between the USDIC Sanctioned camps without the proper certification. You, Mr. Eddelstein, are operating without certification and have been for several years."

"And exactly what can you do about it?" I turned my head to see the ever passionate Antonio shout down from the watchtower. "what, are you gonna arrest us?"

None of us even heard the gunfire. All I saw was Antonio reel back and fall. The sight sent Fratello into a frenzy. " ** _ANTONIO!_** "

Lovino screamed and cussed in Italian, running towards the guard tower, and only stopped when Ivan caught him in his arms and held him back. "You'a fucking let me go, you big fucking vodka sucker!" Lovino's voice was desperate. "I have to save him!"

"You can't save him," Ivan told him quietly, "You have to be strong against them, don't let them think you weak."

Lovino kept up his struggles and his fighting against the Russian's hold for a moment, then died down to quiet sobs and repeating Antonio's name over and over, like the chant would bring him back. Ivan put him down, and let me comfort him instead. Not that I was very good at comforting right now. I had tears rolling down my cheeks, and it was taking everything in me to not bawl right then and there. Antonio was gone! Like a brother to me for as long as I could remember, even before Day Zero, and gone in an instant…. "I couldn't even say goodbye." Lovino sobbed quietly. "I-I loved that stupid bastard…"

"I-I know, fratello," My voice was shakier than I'd hoped it'd be. "H-he's with Nonno now, away from all this."

The crisis within my family drew my attention away from the military standing at our doorstep, and our leader dealing with them. "Well?" the leader of the military group asked, "What will it be, Eddelstein? Will you surrender peaceably, or will I have to use force?"

My eyes went to Roderich. He looked so much older in that moment. He looked over to Elizabeta, who just took his hand in that moment. Then he looked back at me and fratello. His eyes looked glassy and glazed over, like the aristocrat had gone through more in his life than what we'd seen since Day Zero over ten years ago. He locked eyes with me. "Feliciano, go and pack what you can of the food." He said softly, "And the weapons, get all the weapons you can as well. Come back here with them."

I didn't know what he was thinking of doing, but either way I went and did as he'd said. I found Ludwig and Gilbert in the back fence near the greenhouse, unaware of everthing happening at the front gates. "Hey," Ludwig stopped me, "What's going on? Why're you packing all the guns and supplies?"

I looked away from him. "Th-The Military's here…" I told him quietly, "R-Roderich told me to get this stuff, I don't know what he's thinking of doing with it…. D-Dios, Ludwig, they killed Antonio…"

"W-What?" Gilbert looked heartbroken in that moment, "Damn it, not Toni! Give me one of those, I'll kill 'em all myself!"

Gilbert started to reach for a gun, but Ludwig stopped him. "Don't be an idiot, bruder!" Ludwig chastised him, "if it's military they probably have tanks… you couldn't go up against that alone."

Suddenly, I got a really bad feeling in my guts. "I need to get these to them," I said, "Something awful is about to happen…"

"I'm coming with you." Ludwig nodded.

"Me too," Gilbert agreed.

I didn't have time to protest. I simply carried the two gym bags of weapons and supplies and brought them to where Roderich was waiting. "Thank you Feli." He said, "You all may choose to take a gun."

My heart sunk. What was he doing!? There were two tanks pointed our way!

"Gentlemen, my lady," Roderich gestured to all of us, then picked up a shotgun from the several weapons we had, "It's been a pleasure surviving with you all."

He fired the first slugs into the soldiers on the other side of the fence, making them fall to the ground before the rest of the group of twentyish drew their guns and fired upon us as the rest of us scrambled for cover.

I cowered behind the house with Ludwig and Gilbert, too scared to peek behind me and fire at the men with the assault rifles. "L—Ludwig, what do we do?!" I whimpered, "I don't wanna die!"

"Then for god's sake, Feliciano, SHOOT!" he growled in return, "Goddamn it, or get more ammo!"

I was closest to the bag, so I dove out from cover to grab two clips of 9mm, and then dash back to cover, bullets nipping at my heels. "Here!" I shouted over the sounds of gunfire.

Ludwig ducked down behind the scrap metal we hid behind and reloaded his gun. "We're going to have to run," Ludwig shook his head, "There's no other way, there's too many of them!"

"Okay!" I shouted back, "I'm'a fast, I'll go tell the others!"

"Fine!" Ludwig nodded and peeked over the scrap metal just barely, enough to fire into the mass of soldiers, "Just hurry, we can't wait too long!"

I scanned the surrounding area, trying to find who was left. Yao was dead, slumped over a rainbarrel next to the gate. Ivan would soon be dead, he who barreled into the mass of soldiers bereaved by Yao's death and was being shot by all of the soldiers there. Roderich was dying, bleeding out in the arms of his wife. I had only just gotten to them without being nicked by bullets. "Eliza!" I shouted, "there's no way we're getting out of this! We have to run!"

She shook her head. "No Feli!" she shouted back, "You run! I'll hold them off here!"

"But Elizabeta!" I wanted to beg her. _I can't lose more of my family today, I can't!_

"No, Feli." Her voice was calm, like she'd accepted death already, "Get whoever's left out… Roderich and I will stay."

My eyes watered again. I blinked away tears and hugged her. "Thank you for everything," I told her quietly, "Thank you."

"You're welcome, Feli." She said quietly, "I'll tell your Nonno hello."

I hesitated to leave her, but I had to find Lovino. There was no way I was leaving this place without my big brother. "Fratello!" I screamed over gunfire, trying to find him, "Lovino, where are you!?"

Then all at once, my heart stopped. There he was, ascending the stairs to the watchtower. Then it occurred to me: I never actually saw where Antonio was shot. " ** _LOVINO, NO!_** " I screamed, scrambling for the watchtower.

I was too late. I watched as Lovino opened the hatch to the Watchtower, then heard an animalistic snarl and groan as I helplessly watched our childhood best friend- who looked like barely a shadow of who he was only minutes before- sink his teeth into my older brother, who screamed louder than I'd ever heard him scream before.

The whole world seemed to stop. All I could hear was the sound of blood rushing in my ears. Even the gunfire and screams of my big brother were muffled.

Lovino's been bit.

My big brother's been bit.

I regained my bearings, and continued running up the steps to Lovino and what used to be Antonio, knife drawn. Once I got close enough, I plunged the knife into Antonio's temple, which loosened his grip on Lovino's forearm. Lovino reached for something around Antonio's neck and yanked, then put his forehead to Antonio's. "You big stupid bastard," he whispered, "You're such a fucking idiot, I love you…"

He hesitated for a moment, but put a kiss to his forehead. "Ti amo, you big stupid bastard…"

He turned back to me, tears in his eyes. "Come on, stupid." He said, averting his eyes to me. "We've'a gotta get out'a here."

I cast one last look at Antonio, then ran down the stairs again, back to the scrap metal Ludwig and Gilbert were still hiding behind. "Just him?" Gilbert asked.

I nodded sadly. "Everybody else's dead," I felt my voice crack, "W-we're the only ones left!"

"Fuck," Gilbert swore under his breath, "Fuck, fuck, fuck, goddamn it, fuck."

Something tells me the Swear Jar would've been almost entirely Gilbert's quarters. "We'll have to grieve when we're out… we've got an expiration date sitting here!"

He ducked behind the scrap metal, shoving a new clip of ammunition into his rifle. "I have an idea," he told us, "When I say 'run', run."

"Well, no shit, Sherlock." Lovino grumbled under his breath.

Gilbert reached into his knapsack, taking a large roll of tape. He wedged his gun under a few pieces of scrap metal, giving it a few tugs and nudges to make sure it was there tight. Then he put the tape on the trigger of the gun, pausing to look at the rest of us. " ** _Run._** "

I immediately followed his orders and ran like the devil himself was behind me. I didn't look back til we were to the barbed wire fence, to which I saw Gilbert had taped the trigger of the gun so it would fire continuously and be a decoy. Genius! " ** _Keep running, stupido!_** " I heard Lovino hiss

I obeyed immediately, climbing through the barbed fence and making a mad dash for the woods, Lovino, Ludwig, and Gilbert on my heels. All I could hear was my feet on the ground and the rush of blood in my ears. I could barely even hear Ludwig and Gilbert shout for me to stop, to turn around. Once I did, I regretted it instantly. I wished I couldv'e kept running.

Lovino was panting in labored breaths, trembling and shaking, and holding his arm.

That was when I remembered.

Lovino was bit.

My big brother was dying.

"Fuck," Gilbert muttered, pulling up the bloody sleeve, "He's fucking bit!"

Lovino said nothing, just sat with his back against the tree, his face losing color fast. "we can't take him with us," Ludwig shook his head, hand in his hair, " _Gott Verdammt!_ "

My heart broke as I heard the sounds of gunfire cease, and the sounds of yelling get closer. "Go," Lovino's voice was hoarse, "I'll tell them you got caught by Rotters, just go…"

"Lovino…" I didn't know my voice could be so weak. "I-I can't…. N-no, you can't die…"

"I don't have much of a choice, stupid," his voice was gentler, softer. "but I have the choice to make my death worth it. To make Antonio's death worth it…"

I felt my breath hitch. "Lovi…." I whimpered, "How am I supposed to go on without you?"

"You're a survivor, Feliciano." Lovino said plainly, "You'll make it out of this, you'll make it til they find a cure… then you'll have a life where you don't have to run from dogs of the military…" he groaned as he started to stand. "Now give me a fucking hug, fratello."

I felt tears in my eyes as I went to hug him. "S-swear jar, Lovi." I chided softly.

Lovino laughed dryly as he broke the hug. "Put this in your fucking swear jar, fratello." He muttered hoarsely, reaching around his neck, and taking off a necklace of some sort.

"ve… A cross…" I murmured softly, "I didn't know you still had this, Lovi."

"This too…" he added softly, rummaging through his pockets until he found what he was looking for and dropped it into my hand.

"Antonio's cross… a-and Nonno's cross…" I felt my eyes watering. "Lovino, no…"

"Take it," he said, voice growing softer, "You need them more than I do…"

The voices and yelling got louder. "They're getting closer… I have to go." Lovi said. "Ti amo, fratello."

I tried to fight the tears in my eyes as I hugged him one last time. "Ti amo, fratello."

"They're almost here!" Ludwig spoke in a hushed manner. "Feliciano, we have to go!"

I about broke down. "C-Ciao, Fratello," I whimpered softly as I watched him turn into the bushes and walk right out of my life.

I felt a hand grab mine and pull in the other direction. We ran more, and more, and more, until we had to be miles away. But I heard that gunshot echo over all the trees of the forest, and I swear it'd hit me. My walls crumbled down. I let myself cry, and cry, and cry.

Roderich and Elizabeta were dead.

Ivan and Yao were dead.

Nonno was dead.

Antonio was dead.

Now even Lovino was dead.

I felt my heart breaking as I wailed. I was truly alone now. All of my family had been killed or turned, or both. I was really, truly, alone.

Until I felt a hand on my shoulder. I looked up, and saw Ludwig's crystal blue eyes gazing down at me, an awkward attempt at comfort or sympathy in his crystalline irises. "I know it hurts," Ludwig murmured, "but we have to keep moving for right now…. We're not safe here."

I nodded, and looked away, wiping at my eyes. His hand didn't move. "We can grieve for them properly once we've found a place to set up camp. "he continued, "But we're not safe here… We've got to keep being strong for them, if only for awhile longer..."

He kneeled down to where I sat, and hesitantly put his arms around me in an awkward attempt at a hug. "I'm sorry," he murmured, "I know they were your family." He turned me so I looked him in the eyes. "B-but… vhell, if you'll let us, ve'll be your family now."

I studied his eyes for a moment. Even though I still didn't really know them very well, I felt like I could trust both of them, even if Gilbert was a bit of a pottymouth. Slowly, I nodded. "Ve… I… I'd like that…" I informed him quietly, "I'd like that very much."

Then he smiled. He was really handsome when he smiled. "I'm glad, Feliciano." He said, standing. "I don't hear anything. I think they've stopped following us, but we should still find somewhere to set up camp before dark." He offered me a hand.

I took his hand and let him pull me up. "ve, thanks." I murmured, adjusting my knapsack, and starting to walk with them. "Ve, we should'a probably avoid the main roads too. I think I have a map in my pack, but I don't know how to read it."

"I do," Gilbert spoke up, "Hey, military training coming in handy. Surprise, surprise."

I froze. "M-military training?" I stuttered, "I-I didn't know that about you."

"I know what you're thinking, but I'll explain what I mean," Gilbert put his hands up in a manner of surrender. "our vattie was an officer in the army. Fought in wars, killed people, all that crap. Then raised me and Vest how he trained his cadets. Made sure we always knew vhere ve vere, und how to survive, und how to defend ourselves, und all zat. Mein bruder and I vould never be part of those Military Dogs' agendas. And vhat a stupid name, too. USDIC. More like ' _US, DICKS'_."

I felt my face crack a slight smile. "Ve… tell me about it." I replied, finding the map in my knapsack and handing it over.

"Hey, there's a smile," Gilbert smirked weakly. "Even with all this crap, it's nice to see you smile again."

I smiled again slightly, feeling tears behind my eyes. I looked away. I had to be strong. I had to be strong for Gilbert and Ludwig now. I hummed a little under my breath, fingering the crosses Lovi had given me and putting them on the same chain as my own, one at a time.

" _woah, oh, oh, oh,_

 _For the longest time,_

 _Woah, oh, oh, oh,_

 _For the longest_

 _I'm that voice that you're hearing in the hall,_

 _And the greatest miracle of all,_

 _Is how I need you,_

 _And how you needed me too_

 _That hasn't happened for the longest time."_

* * *

 **Wellp, that's all folks! Hope you've enjoyed the ride! :D see you again soon!**


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